Tales from Swarga – Part 3 – All Hands Meet

Swarga gets particularly colder during certain periods of time. Nandi, the great and obedient Leutenant of the Gods ensure it to be so because Lord Shiva like Swarga to be particularly cold on his occasional visits to Swarga. Dwelling for most of the time in some particularly cold areas of the United States of Rakshasas, Lord Shiva is meticulous and prefers everything to be as ordered as his home and offices at Mt Kailasa. From the coldness of the atmosphere, to the pristine clarity of the cloud communication everything has to be just right for the short tempered God.

 

Now the cold does not bother Vyasa, having come from similarly cold environments of Nepal he prefers it cold but he and the rest of the Cloud Infrastructure team are on tenterhooks as ever. After all today is not just any other day. Today is the day of the All Hands Meet, when all the Gods of Swarga do a Conference Ashariri to give updates on the progress and future plans of Swarga. Maharishi Sanaka, who was once an acolyte of Vyasa and is now a full fledged Maharishi with his own speciality department is monitoring the Meteorology portals for any signs of disruption.

 

“Maharshi Vyasaji, I think the addition of the new service provider has made a lot of difference. When it was just Vayu and Varuna we had lots of limitations, however with Agni we have better control of the resources,” Sanaka said.

 

While unloading his satchel and making himself comfortable on his tiger skin Vyasa said, “True, but we should still monitor what these Rishis are doing. The Devas who were once such menaces are so helpful nowadays, however Rishis are always trying for ways to subvert our controls. Especially the new batch of acolytes who have joined Swarga, some of them are too smart, we should keep a better eye.”

 

Just then Lord Vishnu walked in. He hailed Maharishi Sanatana, ” Sanatana, what is the status of the new Homa Kundas we ordered for the new Rishis? The Apsaras have confirmed that we have two Rishis joining this week and three more next week.”

 

Looking up harriedly from his own Homa Kunda where he was on a support call with the Homa Kunda manufacturer, Maharishi Sanatana, a member of Cosmic Infrastructure team but also the Purchase Rishi for Swarga, stood up and replied to the Lord Vishnu, “Prabho, we have raised the Purchase Order, I just need your approval before releasing the order to the manufacturer. Once the order is placed we should be able to get the new Homa Kundas by end of next week.”

 

“End of next week? Oh, that is too bad. Also what about the case for Homa Kundas?” Vishnu asked.

 

“Not to worry, Prabho. I shall send Sanandana to SP Road to get some cases. And in the meanwhile we have some Homa kundas as backup for the Deva Support team that we could give temporarily to the new joinee Rishis,” Sanatana said. Even Gods and Rishis get their stuff from SP Road.

 

“Okay, cool, cool,” Lord Vishnu said before walking away to Vaikunta.

 

“Maharishijee, we are recruiting so many Rishis nowadays. With all the new projects that are coming up here at Swarga and so much recruitment why dont we buy Homa Kundas and other Homa supplies in bulk?” Vyasa asked Sanatana.

 

“What to say, Vyasa jee, I think Swarga believes in Calvin’s principle of nothing inspires better than last minute panic,” Sanatana replied before hurrying back to the Support call. Peering into the flames of his Homa kunda Vyasa could already see prayers from countless other Rishis reaching out to Maharishi Sanatana for support.

 

As Vyasa grabbed his Kamandalu to get some Arishta from the cafetaria in walked Maharishi Vishwamitra, looking buff as usual. As the largest and most powerful of all Maharishis in Swarga, Vishwamitra intimidated even the Gods. Even Lord Shiva, a healthfreak amongst Gods was a bit intimidated in front of Rishi Vishwamitra.

 

“Aay Shapath!! What traffic we have nowadays here in heaven!! It took me two Yugas to reach here from my hermitage. Let me quickly grab some snacks before Durvasa comes asking me for more favors,” Vishwamitra was nowadays working more and more with Durvasa. While initially he was the Lead of Universal Observation Team of late Durvasa, banking on his years of experience had become Senior Brahmarshi. Despite his years of experience Durvasa often needed help from the much junior Maharishis for doing his work and the Maharishis obliged in respect of his venerable old age.

 

As Vyasa walked besides the Homa areas of Maharishini Gargi he could see Nandi setting up the paraphernalia for the Ashariri that was about to happen in a few more hours. While Shiva, Vishnu, Brahma were all here at Swarga, some of the newer Gods were still at the office in United States of Rakshasas. Over the yugas the number of Gods had risen considerably. From the initial duo of Shiva and Vishnu Brahma had joined their ranks. Indra, who was the Senior Manager of Deva Support Services was now the God of Support Services with a slew of projects under his Kamandalu. There now are some demi gods too, Surya here at Swarga itself, Ganesha and Kartikeya at USR working with Lord Shiva.

 

Somehow there are no female Gods in Swarga.

 

While getting his Arishta he could see the gods playing table tennis, Shiva and Vishnu on one side and Brahma and Surya on the other side. It was strange, all the gods are usually experts at playing this game. Taking care not to spill his Arishta Vyasa walked over to the where Gargi sits as the Conference Ashrariri started. The Ashariri was started by Menaka, the Leader of Apsaras and soon she made way for Ravana, one of the leaders of Lanka, a new client of Swarga. Vyasa felt his attention wandering as Ravana, with his ten heads was saying different motivational stories and Vyasa thought back to the day Ravana had come to Swarga for a client visit. Several Rishis and Rishinis had done special pujas of singing and dancing to entertain the visiting Asura and the music loving Ravana himself had sung a few songs. Shortly after Ravana the Gods of Swarga started speaking about the updates from their own domain. Lord Shiva, the Senior God of Business Development spoke about the various new clients and projects that have been acquired by Swarga, Lord Vishnu spoke of the various innovations done by the Rishis of Swarga, Lord Brahma spoke about the updates from the long standing clients like Patala and Naraka. Menaka later chimed in with announcements of various awards and updates of the Swarga, especially relating to the well being of the Rishis and Devas. One special update was that of introduction of tea and coffee made using actual milk in the cafetaria. The Apsaras and the management of Swarga were particularly proud of that.

 

 

Soon the Conference Ashariri concluded and the Rishis and Devas dispersed to their hermitages. Packing his satchel Vyasa too left for the day, now his only worry about how he would sleep at night seeing as he was struggling to stay awake during the Conference.

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